My Friends,
Yesterday I decided it would be prudent to stop living off of my savings as I have been since September and re-enter the job market. I dropped off applications/resumes at The Keg and Milestones, looking to get hired on as a server. Job-hunting has to be my least favourite thing in the world because of my fear of rejection, but also because it takes some presumption to walk into a place and hand them a resume. It's the equivalent of saying "motherfucker, you don't know how much you need me, but I do, so you best hire me." That said, the two places I stopped at went well enough; the Keg told me they were fully-staffed but given my previous employment with the Keg they would pass my resume along to the dining-room manager, and the guy at Milestones said he would give me a shout before the end of the week.
This was all well and good but it didn't give me the feeling of well-being you might expect and not merely because two jobs in the bush don't equal one in the hand. Rather, my lack of peace of mind was more attributable to the fact that if/when I get a job, it is the beginning of the next phase of what I want to do with my life, and I am quite nervous about it. Essentially, there is another job I want, more of a career than a job (Not to disparage employment in the food-service industry because its a ton of fun and a great livelihood. But in the career-type job they will be looking more at the education I have paid so dearly for and they will probably not also employ high-school students like every job I have had thus far), and I don't feel quite ready to apply for it yet.
Why don't I feel ready? Feelings of inadequacy really; my wardrobe consists mostly of wife-beaters, jeans and athletic clothes, and I would like to invest in some more 3-piece ensembles before I start knocking down doors and demanding employment.
Yesterday I decided it would be prudent to stop living off of my savings as I have been since September and re-enter the job market. I dropped off applications/resumes at The Keg and Milestones, looking to get hired on as a server. Job-hunting has to be my least favourite thing in the world because of my fear of rejection, but also because it takes some presumption to walk into a place and hand them a resume. It's the equivalent of saying "motherfucker, you don't know how much you need me, but I do, so you best hire me." That said, the two places I stopped at went well enough; the Keg told me they were fully-staffed but given my previous employment with the Keg they would pass my resume along to the dining-room manager, and the guy at Milestones said he would give me a shout before the end of the week.
This was all well and good but it didn't give me the feeling of well-being you might expect and not merely because two jobs in the bush don't equal one in the hand. Rather, my lack of peace of mind was more attributable to the fact that if/when I get a job, it is the beginning of the next phase of what I want to do with my life, and I am quite nervous about it. Essentially, there is another job I want, more of a career than a job (Not to disparage employment in the food-service industry because its a ton of fun and a great livelihood. But in the career-type job they will be looking more at the education I have paid so dearly for and they will probably not also employ high-school students like every job I have had thus far), and I don't feel quite ready to apply for it yet.
Why don't I feel ready? Feelings of inadequacy really; my wardrobe consists mostly of wife-beaters, jeans and athletic clothes, and I would like to invest in some more 3-piece ensembles before I start knocking down doors and demanding employment.
I'm thinking I'll spring for some tweed. I already have the pipe and I'm still undecided on the leather cap & goggles
I know this is a superficial concern but unfortunately we live in a world where the garments you wear give an indication of your suitability for the job...
What He said!
...so I am forced to play the game. This is where the job-type job comes into play; clothes cost money so now I will make some so I can upgrade the wardrobe to the level of refinement society expects from a 27-year-old.
However, it must be said that waiting is more than a means to an end. Its a fun job and one I could see myself doing for years alongside other jobs. If nothing else, its a break from routine, gives you an opportunity at problem-solving (every table is different), and forces you to keep your interpersonal skills sharp.
I'm gonna go a tweak my resume some more but will keep posted on developments in the job-market and also the process by which I psych myself up for the next step.
Stay Thirsty,
-Andre Guantanamo
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